Let The Countdown Begin...

beginnings.  beginnings of endings.  additions.  loss.  saying yes.  screaming no.  birthdays.  ordinary days.  big news.  baby steps.  leaps of faith.  stalls of doubt.  career questions.  life answers.  things i didn't want to hear.  things i was lucky enough to hear.  me became mom.  he became dad.  they became ours.  we became theirs.  everything is different.  i always knew it would be this way. 

good job, 2012.  i'm impressed.  2013 has some big shoes to fill.

happy new year, to you and yours.

The Purest Form of Genuine

yesterday the in country director of the covering shared the following letters written by some of our TRS children to the families in newtown, connecticut.

i am overwhelmed at the amount of grace, courage, and love that accompany their words.

there is a tightly bound thread that runs between those who have the deep understanding of loss and tragedy.  we all feel it, but those who have experienced such to it's fullest are instantly members of an inner circle.  their offers of comfort and prayers are the purest form of genuine, their sharing of the grief resulting in the heaviest of hearts.

i am so very proud of these children for offering this sense of community to a community they have yet to meet.

Tuesday's Best: ReindeerS, America, and Most Bestest Perfectest

this morning's tuesday's best was the best so far.  if i could call it the most bestest without the grammar police attacking me i sure would.  because it was.  most bestest perfectest.

next tuesday is christmas, and the week after that is new years, so we won't be skyping for 3 full weeks.   normally this would make me all sorts of sad, but not after this morning's call.  this morning, we really felt like a family.

the kids sang us christmas carols and asked us to sing them a few as well.  after realizing that we didn't know any of the verses to 'we wish you a merry christmas' josh suggested that we teach them 'rudolph the red nosed reindeer' and it should be noted that josh seems to think the plural of reindeer is reindeerS.  really.  he sang it both times.  i have video proof.  we will obviously not be homeschooling...

i played guitar for them and taught them a portion of a song for them to sing with me (can one collect skype royalties? hypothetically of course), geraldine got up on the chair and did her standard booty dance (oh boy), mohamed asked us to bring him socks when we come visit in january and a photo album full of pictures of himself (hilarious and sweet), then the best thing ever...

gerald leaned in close to the camera and said, "go there!"

we asked him where and he shouted, "america!"

be still my adopting heart.  the kids don't know that we are trying to adopt them.  in case something terrible were to happen and adoption was no longer a possibility they only know that if it was ever an option for us to bring them home we would love to do so.  i couldn't bear for them to be as devastated as we would be if that didn't happen.  to protect their high hopes and their trust in us that we will follow through with what we say, they have less than limited information on what we are fighting for this side of the pacific.

america.  soon enough, sweet boy.  i promise you.  soon enough.

merry christmas to my favorite four.  may you know that you are loved.  may you know that you are wanted.  may you know that you are fought for.  25 days until i pick you up and don't put you down for a solid week.

merry christmas to all and to all a good skype.

america

singing christmas carols

the booty dance that will be the death of me in her teenage years

guitar time.  this is pretty much what every audience i've ever had looks like... ;)

Monday Morning

this weekend.

this weekend.

i cried every day.   i felt a deep, sharp, and acute aching for the parents who lost their children, whether student or teacher, in the connecticut shooting.  i felt an equal concern for the children who survived, for the things they saw.  i wondered how one particular mother would have survived with some amount of accountability for this tragedy falling on her as people searched for someone to blame.  i wondered what monday morning would be like across the country.

today parents will bundle up their children and walk them to the bus, or drop them off in front of their schools.  today children will ask why there are armed guards in front of the doors.  today parents will have to answer that question.  today we will hug our children a little tighter, teachers will go back to work more family than co-workers, we will mourn, we will remember, we will learn, we will grow, and we will make the impossible choice to shift our focus toward things worth celebrating.  why?  because it's monday morning.  and that's what monday's are for.

today i am grateful to not have to search for my reason to celebrate.  and that, right there, is a start.

---------------------

today is the 2nd birthday of sweet baby abi, daughter to my friends sean and mary susan and favorite miracle baby to all.  this fall she made the long journey home from ghana, the place of her birth, to tennessee.  here she will receive daily the gift of opportunity.  the gift of a childhood.  the gift of waking up every morning just to be cuddled all day. 

 in two years she has overcome more adversity than most experience in a lifetime.  

to me, that sounds like twice the reason the celebrate.  

sweet abiella,

happiest of birthday's, little one.  i hope you enjoy your first party.  i hope you get to watch your favorite beyonce dvd and that your mama and daddy don't put you down all day.  thank you for always being a reason to celebrate.  

i love you,

auntie m

Hakuna Ma-Clavicle

geraldine has fractured her clavicle.

yep.

that's my girl.

just as ungraceful as i am.

she ran into a bed and her shoulder was still hurting her a couple of days later so they finally got it x-rayed.

busted clavicle.

today i wish i was there.  today i wish she was here.  broken babies belong cuddled up on the couch with their mom, tucked under earl snuggs (the first thing josh and i bought for the new house was a giant quilt and we named him earl snuggs... our disgustingly mushy and equally hilarious nod to the bluegrass giant) watching a plethora of disney movies.  

hakuna matata, baby girl.  no worries.  it'll be ok.  and i love you. 

alright, i'm off to scrub my floors 'til they look like the top of the chrysler building (annie quote).  we're hosting the raining season christmas party at our new house tonight because i am a crazy person and offered to serve hors d'oeuvres on top of cardboard boxes.  what new house?  oh yeah.  we finally found one!  forgot to tell you about that.  and it's just plain hard to type when you're up to your elbows in paint and can't find your glasses because you're 30 now and your eyes have begun the downward spiral toward failing you.  i'm 30?  oh yeah, forgot to tell you about that too... we have a lot to catch up on.  my bad.  talk soon.

happy weekend!

m

Tuesday's Best - Put Your Head On My Shoulder

this week at gung ho heart it was all cuddling up  for story time, counting down for our next visit, talking about what christmas really means, and trying to call dad on an auntie's cell phone.

i adore these faces.  i cannot wait to see them in 4 short weeks.

storytime

brothers

long distance phone call

yep.  still love looking at pictures of ourselves.

auntie love.

happy tuesday's best!

xo,

m

Tuesday's Best x 2

oh heeeeey!  it's me!  i'm back!  

i've been moving, hence the hiatus, and it is safe to say that josh and i will be living in this house until we croak.  i am never ever ever (taylor swift quote) packing or lifting or unpacking or organizing or, let's be honest, dusting crown molding again.

but now i have internet again.  after 6 hours with the comcast guy it is nothing short of a christmas miracle.  so we can continue talking about our 'yes' conversation tomorrow and i can show you tuesday's best photos like an annoying mom. 

last week we were missing two very big things for our usual skype call.  

1.  josh 

(he was in vegas for work and no child should have to talk to their parent when they are 5 days deep in vegas.)

2.  gerald's front tooth!

yep.  gerald fell and knocked his front tooth so loose that it had to be pulled.  he was INCREDIBLY embarrassed about it and when i told him he looked handsome he turned around and started to cry!  poor baby.  just about broke my heart.  his tears caused me to start crying and everything just went downhill from there.  i was a super sensi mess the whole time.  pull it together soldier!

i did, however, manage to choke out an introduction of my friend, meesa, who was there skyping with me.  well, actually we were at her parents house because they live just down the street from me and had internet and breakfast sandwiches on white bread oh my glob is there anything better?

no josh, no tooth, lots of tears, and meesa.

mo showing his guns to meesa.  lady killer.

the toothless wonder.

so that was last week.  this week josh was back, but now three other things were missing.  mamie's teeth!  holy dental work batman.  we've lost 4 teeth in 1 week.  just wait until josh and mine start falling out.  maybe we can get a 6 for 1 special on dentures?

zero front teeth.

matching outfit twin love.

gerald practicing his fanning skills.  told him i'd need them when i visit in january and its 110 degrees.

i pulled out the guitar for the first time in a year.  i was totally a hit.  famous.

a little qt with the bigs today.

happy tuesday's best!

m